Romans 14:1–12Scripture
Everybody turn with me in your Bibles to Romans chapter 14, and we continue on. We have been in Romans for two years. What is the exact time frame? Has it been quite two years? It'll be two years in June. In June, so we're close. We are nearing the end. We do go barely over two years, right? And so, we're nearing the end, and then we will begin our journey in Exodus, which I think will be very helpful for us. The Apostle Paul certainly was an Old testament scholar. It is definitely a book that shaped the Jewish nation. It was one they were very familiar with, and it has some impact for us as we consider what the Apostle Paul's talking about in Romans. And so we'll go back and we'll get to visit some of that, and I think it'll be very helpful for us, and even shaping and forming some of our understanding in Romans as well. But Romans chapter 14. We had Easter last week, I hit pause, and so I combined two sections, and this is a large section.
This is the largest section we have taken in our journey through Romans. It's huge, it's enormous. But I feel like overall, for the most part, this section, 1 through 9, is cohesive, and I think I can extrapolate for us today a few issues out of here that will be helpful. How many of you want to have a helpful Sunday, right? It'll be really helpful for us, especially in a world that seems so discombobulated and ununified, and specifically in churches that seem so
Point 1Welcome the weak; do not quarrel over opinions
Ununified. There's disunity and disharmony in the churches, and he speaks to this. Verse 1 says this: As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions. Notice here it says opinions. Now, I know today it's gotten convoluted because we think our opinions are truth, and they are in fact not. Matter of fact, opinion, if you look it up in the dictionary, is founded on the lack of truth or the absence of it. And there are many people today that have opinions that they market as truth and live their life accordingly. They walk around with puffed-up chests thinking their opinion should rule the house, and rule a relationship, and rule a friendship, and rule the church.
But the reality is our world should be ruled by truth and not opinions.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 2:49
Opinions bring disharmony in every sort in our lives, in every relationship. Opinions are the thing that bring division more and quicker than anything else we have ever thought of. How many opinions are floating out there today in social media, in the social sphere, if you will? For those of you who are checked out of social media, God bless your soul. I want to be you when I grow up, all right? I really do. I just can't bring myself to part. There are times I've probably quit social media three or four times, but I feel that it is helpful for me to be involved. But I have limited my use there because, quite honestly, I'm tired of hearing everyone's opinions. What we need in the internet world is some truth.
Truth is not accepted in the world today. It is a dirty word, it's an offensive word.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 3:44
Now, it doesn't say not to argue over truth. It says do not argue over opinions. There are some conversations that should be had regarding when someone speaks against truth. We should be having some conversations, right? I just want to break that down for you. I think that's important. All right, moving on. One person believes he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables. What is the deal with these vegetarians? This is an issue between the Jews and the Gentiles, really. And let's just, I'm just going to do this real quickly. I don't have time to go into it, that's not my point today. But I will say that because the Gentiles were coming into the church so quickly, there were both Jews and Gentiles. The Jews typically seemed to be more resistant to the gospel. The Gentiles were coming in by the droves, and because the Gentiles were coming in by the droves, they had an understanding of their freedom a little different than the Jews did, and their freedom in Christ. They did not come from a world where ceremonial laws were put in place, and so now that we are recipients of Christ, the ceremonial things, we have been freed from that. That was lost on the Jews when they became Christians, and so they continued on doing these ceremonial things: the way they ate, the way they walked, the way they talked, how they functioned. They functioned according to these ceremonial laws that were put in place. And so we know that there are moral laws and there are ceremonial laws. There are many ceremonial laws today in the greater evangelical movement, today in Christianity, that we do not abide by. How many of you know that? And there were many of them. Now, in the church here in Rome, there were Jews who still followed those ceremonial laws, and there arose then in the midst of the church between the Jews and the Gentiles, all right, this issue, and division arose in the fellowship, and dissension began to ensue, and arguments over what was right. Should we still follow these ceremonial laws? Are we free in Christ to eat what we please? All right, these debates, in some way or another, or some fashion or another, carry on today. Should we have tattoos or not? That's, I have some... How should our hair be cut? Back in the day it was, for many ministers of the gospel, I came up in a very hyper-fundamental... Fundamentalism is not bad, hyper-fundamentalism is kind of dangerous, where my grandfather couldn't even wear a wedding ring when he preached. He couldn't wear a wedding ring at all. He was adorning himself with something that should not be there. He was not to watch TV. I found it kind of awesome, well, later on in my life, when I realized that he wore a wedding ring at home, just not at church or out and about, and he had a TV in his basement that was covered with a sheet. He would go downstairs an hour each night, undo his TV, and watch TV down in his basement in case some person or parishioner from the church came and knocked on the door and looked in the window and saw him watching TV. And so there are issues that arise in the church of what we believe we should do or not do. Back in the day, when I was a young man, when I was a teenager, you would go to hell if you went to a movie theater, and if you danced at a prom, you were going to hell. Are you with me? These were issues that literally were in the church. When you became a member of the church, and the church that I attended, if you had to sign a covenant to not dance if you were going to be a member of the church, to not go to the theater. And issues arose much like this in the church. How should you dress, how what should you wear, what should you do, what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. The same issue arose then, and we have many of them today. You can make your lists. Verse 4 goes on and said, let not... Let no one who eats despise... This is verse 3: Let no one who eats despise the one who abstains, and not... Let not the one who abstains pass judgment on the one who eats, for God has welcomed them. Let me just go ahead and say, who are you to not welcome somebody that God has welcomed? Who are you to do that? Verse 4 goes on and says that, I really need to implement that, I guess: Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And then listen what he says, in case you think he's going to fall before his master, because if God's your master, here's what will happen. If God's their master, here's what will happen: he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand. Even when he falls, he will be held up because God is his master, or her master. That's God's heart for those in which he's their master. He will not allow you to fall. I love that's beautiful. One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike.
Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind. The one who observes the day observes it in honor of the Lord. The one who eats in honor of the Lord, since he gives thanks to God, while the one who abstains in honor of the Lord and gives thanks to God. Notice here, both that abstaining and indulging are both done in the honor of the Lord. Now, let us just pause here for a second. There is unruly... There are unruly people in the church today who indulge to a level that is ungodly. Are you with me? The Bible cautions us, later on we are going to read about drinking wine. There is indulging, but then the Bible cautions us to not be drunk. Are you with me today? And so the caution is there, although the indulgence is there. And these people specifically, not everybody in the church who indulges, but these people listed here are indulging in honor of the Lord and thanksgiving of the Lord. That is the foundation of their indulging: thanksgiving to the Lord. All right. For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself. For if we live to the Lord, and if we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or we die, we are the Lord's. You are his property. For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord of both the dead and the living. So in case you were wondering if you need to be judge and jury and Lord for the people here on earth because God's too busy dealing with dead people, he reminds you that's his job too, in the church and out of the church.
That's his job too.
He's not just taken up and so busy with all the dead people that he now has entrusted you to become judge, jury, and executioner for anybody you think's out of line.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 11:58
He is Lord and judge of the living and the dead, and all of us live unto him, and we answer to him, not to each other. For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord both of the living and the dead. Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God.
It's almost like it's reminding you, do you forget you're a sinner too? Even you're going to stand before God. Listen, it would be hard to be a judge in a case that you're being prosecuted in, the same case, as being guilty. It'd be even harder to be a judge in a case where you've already pled guilty, and if he's your master, you have already pled guilty. So who are you to judge now? What do we do with all the scriptures where it says that we are to use sound judgment, and we're supposed to deal with sin in a certain way? What do we do with those scriptures? This isn't talking about sin. This is talking about things that are not sin that other people call sin that are not sin. Christians should use sound judgment when someone is in sin in our fellowship, and they should say something about it. So in case you're here today and you've been living a life of rousing sin, and you're looking for an excuse for people to not get up in your business and tell you how to live your life and have an opinion about how much debauchery and sinfulness and hatefulness and anger and nastiness is in you, and it's no one's right to say anything, and you call yourself a Christian? Wrong. This is not a pass for you that nobody can point out your problems. It's not a pass. That's not what he's getting at. He's talking about unity where there should be unity. He's talking about us calling things sin that's not called sin in the Bible. He's talking about a sense, an attitude of arrogance that rises up in all men that makes us think we've got the best answer, we've got the best ways, we are the best, and everybody else needs to acquiesce to the way we live, and we need more of me in the world, and if we had more of me in the world would be a better place. And the reality is, if we had more of you in the world, it's a problem. Why do you pass judgment on people? And then verse 11: For it is written, As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God. Then I love this, verse 12, it's beautiful: So then each of us will give an account of himself to God. Now, all of us who are Christians, who are part of the church, we understand the Word of God. We're very much aware of the power of sin and its devastating effect, not just on families, right? I mean, we even know that sin is devastating to families, but on the family of God. Okay, let me just give you an example. If a father in a house is an alcoholic and is abusive, both verbally, physically, and any other way in the house, how many of you know that affects the entire household?
Sin permeates an entire family and affects it like leaven in bread, in yeast.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 16:39
It has an effect on everything around it, and it's not just the immediate family, but it is the family of God as well. The Apostle Paul, in all the Epistles, and then even here in Romans 12, before we got to 14, he begins to talk about the importance of how sin and unrighteousness, and not putting off old clothes and not putting on the new man, keeping on the old man and not putting on the armor of God, that this type of living, this sinful living, this old man living, affects everything. It damages everything, it divides everything, it mutilates everything. It is not okay. So then why would the Apostle Paul then come to a place and say, stop dividing over stuff? Because he's not talking about sin here. He's already talked about sin and the damage it causes in the world today.
It is disgusting to him, it repulses him, it is not okay, and God wants to squash sin, not only in the lives of individuals, but in the lives of families, not only in the lives of families, but in friendships, not only in friendships, but in the church. It is reprehensible to God. It can destroy harmony, it can sap strength, it can, for all intents and purposes, negate entirely an individual's and a community's testimony. So throughout the New Testament there's this ringing call for purity of the church. Now, I'm going to give you a few scriptures. Jesus introduces this in Matthew 18 when he said, if a brother is in sin, ignore it so you don't cause division. It's not what it says. If a brother's in sin, go to him. If he doesn't hear you, take a witness. If he doesn't hear them, tell the whole church. Well, that's church abuse, are you with me? If this happened to one of... If this happened, not to any of you, but if this happened to somebody today and it was brought before the whole church, what do you think we'd go down with that? There is a place for this type of discipline because sin destroys like leaven, ruining the whole mixture. Matthew 18: if he doesn't hear you, go to the whole church. And the idea of the passage, of course, is to instruct us that we need to deal with sin in the church because sin has such a debilitating and crippling effect on the body. We find out as we come into the Pauline Epistles the same is true, whether that be in 1 Corinthians chapter 5. It says that if they just... If they have just a little leaven, it will wind up leavening the whole lump. In other words, a little bit of sinful influence will have a pervasive effect, like leaven does on the whole loaf of bread. Parents, listen to me today, you're guardians of this type of leaven. You're guardians. What does that mean? So I'm gonna kick my man out, I'mma kick my woman out? We can talk about that extreme at some point, but the reality is you have a responsibility. Husbands, when you're in sin and your wife comes to you and talks about your sin, she is doing so because she is guarding the home. Men, wives, when the husbands come to you and they talk to you about your sin, he is doing so because he is guarding the home, and he knows that sin destroys the lump. Sin should be called out. There are biblical examples of Paul telling us that sin should be dealt with, and for somebody who wants to carry on with that sin and expect to stay and affect the whole lump, the Bible says to remove that person from the fellowship so the whole lump is not destroyed.
There is extreme language in the Bible about dealing with sin. In the second letter to the Corinthians, 7:1, he cries out and says, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. Again, calling for holiness in the church we are to instruct. We are also instructed that if we find anyone in the church who is in sin, we should not fellowship with them. That's extreme language. How does this jive with what we're reading in Romans 14? One's talking about sin and one is not. He told the Philippians and the thessalonians we're not to even eat a meal with people who choose to continue on in sin with disregard for how it affects the body, because the potential for destruction is great. And then our Lord and the Apostle reiterating, encouraged us to come frequently to the Lord's table, and every time we come to the Lord's table, we're to do what? Examine ourselves. In other words, take stock of our own lives and see if there's sin there, because sin is the single greatest danger to the church that we are most aware of, and the Scriptures are filled with injunctions and exhortations in regards to that. When I, in dealing with my kids when they were younger, one of the most annoying things with my children when they were younger, when they were younger, not now, when they were younger, okay, so don't indict them and judge them, when they were younger they had this inability to own what they had done. They had an inability to be able to say, I was wrong, I'm sorry. Today in the church there are people like this. There are children who grow up in homes who never hear their parents ever apologize for anything they do that's wrong, and we teach our children to be selfish, narcissistic, unaware, non-contributing members of society, and God says to take inventory, because there's somewhere in your life right now, 100 percent, in this room, you're wrong. Why do you have to take inventory every time you take the Lord's Supper?
Because there's always something, and always a place where you're wrong.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 25:51
Even you, Pastor? Especially me. Are you with me today? And if I were to echo the words of the Apostle Paul, I am the chief of all. Are you with me? Because the more you realize your sinfulness... No, let me back it up. The more, the greater you realize how glorious and magnificent and wonderful and awesome God is, the more you see your sinfulness, the smaller God is to you, the greater you are. This is why he says, magnify the Lord with me. Why?
Because he wants you to have a big God picture so you can have a realistic self-picture. And
Pastor Shawn Gray · 26:27
an unrealistic self-picture, an unrealistic self-picture looks down your nose at everyone and says they're the cause for my screw-ups. This is the type of person that comes and judges people for things that are not sin because they can't even see the sin in themselves. Are you with me? So there are three issues that I see in this text in the church. I'm going to give them in points to you, all right? Because sometimes I go through, and if you're a great note taker like my wife, someday I want to be a great note taker like her, sometimes I read back her notes and I'm like, wow, that is amazing, and I'm pretty sure it's not because of the way I said it, but it's because you're an awesome note taker. So if you're a bad note taker today, that's okay, that's okay. I'll give you the actual points, you won't have to figure them out. There are things that are a problem and causing a problem in the church. One is diversity in the church. It is evident how we should handle the sin problem in the church, but what other problems do we see in this text that sin is actually at the heart of? I'm
Point 2Diversity in the church tempts us to division
Going to give them to you. I want to share them and have you consider them. The first is diversity in the church. Romans 14:1, as a reminder: As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but do not quarrel over opinions. One person believes he may eat while the other person only eats vegetables. Listen to the diversity there. How many vegetarians do we have in the house? One. There's diversity. Not extreme, but there's diversity. It's interesting because I would consider myself friends with Lacy. I don't get to hang out with her quite as much as JR, and she's, and it's like two introverts trying to be friends is like, it's like impossible. But I love and cherish her. When she comes over to our house, one of the things that we ask is, what can you have and what can't you have? And her diversity from me affects me, although it's one in our fellowship, and it should, and sometimes my life makes adjustments for her life. But the problem today is we're so self-aware, we're not others-aware, and we have created a world for ourselves where I can live in such a way that I don't have to adjust my life around anybody else, and we don't want to be, we don't want anyone else to be an imposition. Let me just, news flash: if you are in a relationship with another human being, they are an imposition to your life.
There is no such thing as living in harmony with somebody without it affecting your life.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 30:03
We had a Super Bowl party and had Liz over to our house. Liz has got a tick bite and can't have meat. She can't even smell meat. Talk about a bummer, because there's nothing quite like, everything you do for snacks for a Super Bowl party has some meat up in there. One night, and so, I was so pumped Liz was coming over, at the same time I was like, really? No meat? One night she came over to rub my shoulder because it's all messed up, and I had been resisting.
She'd offered, I didn't, and I finally just caved in and it was very helpful. But my boys went to go to the Mexican restaurant, came back home, and they ran upstairs, because you basically smell like a burrito when you go there. They ran in real fast upstairs, took their clothes off, put it in the washing machine, covered it up, and took a shower so they did not bother her. This is what our lives do when there's diversity. We don't tell people, get over it, or be better, or why can't you just be more like me? I mean, I don't go up to Liz's kids and rub peanuts in their face because I like peanuts. That would be crazy, that puts people in the hospital. Are you with me today? Now, this is just food allergies, but we're talking about food, and it's crazy because the Apostle Paul's going, just because you can, just because you're free to, doesn't mean you don't consider another person. All right, there is diversity. Romans 14:5 says, One person esteems one day as better than the other, while another esteems all days alike. Now, if you look around this morning, you'll see a tremendous amount of diversity. Some people will be dressed up, there's a few of you in suits and ties, I love that. Some of you will be dressed down, I love that. I love that. I remember going to an ordination meeting with several people on a panel, and I didn't know that I was having the ordination meeting. I was an interview. It was a checkup, if you will, with a panel of people, all in suits and very intimidating, all with their doctorates, and I came in with holey jeans and a messed up shirt with a little bit of paint on it because I thought I was just going to be sitting in the crowd. I had no clue I was going to be in there, and I did not dress accordingly. They began to berate me about my attire. My response to them was, next time i'll be sure to wash the outside of the cup and make sure that the inside is dirty, maybe that will make you happy.
There are some of you here today who come to church dressed as you are because you understand, or you have an understanding or, when you view whether you should dress up at church in your Sunday best or come as you are, you think, I'm always before the Lord. I'm not going to present something that I don't present. And you know what? That's doing what you do as thanks unto the Lord and honoring him, because you are what you are, and you'll be authentic, and that's wonderful. And there are some of you here who put on your Sunday best because it's important to present the best side of yourself, and that is a wonderful thing, and you should be. You do it as thanks unto the Lord, to honor the Lord. Both are doing what they do to honor the Lord. One is not right, one is not better. And if you're convinced that this is essential to do that. Neither one is a sin, one is not better than the other. Are you with me here today? So there's diversity. There are young people and old people. All the old people said amen. My knee, I'm 46, my knee is 86. Brook actually went and got an X-ray on her spine and neck. Her neck is 70 and she's 40. She's got bone spurs and arthritis, sitting in... I'm telling you, she's an old lady on the inside and she's a young lady on the outside. Can I get an amen? Can all the people with bad joints and bones and messed up ligaments, because you got some age on you, say amen? Right, some of you are young, some of you are old, some of you look young on the outside but on the inside you old. And as I've always said about Pastor JR, and I love him, and I love you, brother, he's like a grandpa on our staff. He is Grandpa. He don't look like a grandpa, you're my homie, and I love you look handsome, you look young, but he functions like a grandpa. Like, if he pulls up and he parks his car in the back, like I have, so I could sell it, my car, I just have it parked there for right now, because I can't have more than three cars at my house that I'm running, and it had a bike rack on it, I'm not even going to worry about his bike rack on the back, but Grandpa JR is scared that it's going to get stolen, and so, because he cares, and because grandpas take care of things, and because they consider other people, and because they take care of other people, he pulled the bike rack off. I came in one day and thought that thing was stolen. I didn't even consider that another human being would actually consider to be helpful, because that's not what I would do.
But I didn't consider Grandpa JR, and he had pulled it off there and put it in there, and that's what I love about him. We're different. Does that mean I don't love God as much as JR because he's nice to people? I mean, what's wrong with me that I don't want to go help everyone in this church move? I mean, I love y'all, I love y'all, but I don't want to move y'all. But JR, he'll move all y'all. Just call him. If your dog dies, yeah, he'll move all y'all. If your dog dies, he'll come dig a hole for your dog and help you bury it in the backyard. That I love that about JR. I love it. So he must be more godly and love people more and he's a better person than me? No, we're different. That's right. Thank God for JR in this fellowship. Thank God for him. Thank God for me. I know I seem cold, like Scrooge, but thank God for me too. Are you with me? We all have our role to play. We're different.
Diversity is good, but it can become the foundation for dissension.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 37:42
It can become the foundation for dissension. Young people, don't think your parents are... And old people in the church are so old they're not relevant, they're so old they have nothing to teach you, they're so old they don't understand your world. They have things to say to you, and you should perk up and listen. Kirk said, don't you forget it. Oh, somebody else back there said it's important. It's important. And older people, don't think just because they're young all you have to give is insight, but you have nothing to learn from the young people, because diversity is the means by which he forms and shapes the fellowship of believers. All right.
Some of us prevent our growth because we reject the way he chooses to grow us.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 38:33
And some of you have been held at a place and you are at a roadblock and you cannot go and advance any further in your life because the means by which he's going to shape you have rejected in the fellowship. Men, some of you want growth and you feel like you keep hitting a ceiling and there's a lack of growth in your life, and you're open to reach out to this man and that man, and you want this counsel and you want this advice and you want this mentor, and you're reaching out to all the men you can get to mentor you in your marriage, but it might be that the device and the means by which God is going to shape and release you to the next level is your wife. Teach me how to be a better man. And oftentimes, sometimes, he'll make your wife contentious to shape you. In case you wives think that it's all about you and how awesome you are, sometimes he will even use your sin to strengthen your men. But why is it that diversity produces disunity? Why is that? It was true in the early church, and I would probably guess that it's even more true now than it was then because we are a melting pot of diversity today. Ooh, baby. But here you have what we will call non-moral preferences that we want to talk about here. Non-moral preferences. I'm not talking about homosexuality and transgenderism and all of that stuff. I'm talking about non-moral preferences. In other words, it isn't necessarily a sin issue in and of itself to do or not do these kinds of things we're talking about, but it can become a very serious issue in the church, and it needs to be confronted, and we need to
Point 3Unbalanced love of self undermines love in the church
Understand what the Bible teaches about it so that we can get along well with one another. Diversity in the church has become a problem, and at the heart of that is sin and selfishness. The other problem in the church is love in the church. Now, keep in mind that the issue here is the essential, is the essential and maintaining unity in the church. That's the issue. Apostle Paul's talking about it. It's Ephesians 4:3: endeavoring to keep the bond of peace, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit and the bond of peace. And love, that's what it is. It's what Paul said in Colossians 3:14, it's maintaining love, which is the bond of perfection, which ties everything and everyone together. It's unity we're talking about here. It is loving compatibility of very diverse people, and we have a love problem in the church even, and it's a real important issue. Our Lord Jesus in John 13 said that men are going to know that you're my disciples if you what? Love one another. And Jesus prayed in John 17 that we would be one, not only redemptively but certainly in a sense of how we demonstrate our redemption in the world. And this comes with difficulty. It comes with grave difficulty. It's difficult to love in diversity because the church is made up of such diverse elements and people. I wrote this in my journal, and I'm going to read it just as I wrote it, and I want you to try to write it just as I wrote it, and I want you to contemplate it. The problem we have with loving others is our unbalanced love of self. An unbalanced love of self, when unchecked, preys on diversity, creating opportunities for self-elevation at the expense of diminishing others. Diversity and personality types. Okay, fasten your seat belts today, because I'm not just preaching at you, I'm learning with you. But we think a lot of our personality type. Oh man, we get it. I get what I need, 40-minute baths. I get it. I get why, after a party, I got to decompress for two hours to recharge my battery. Life goes down to 5 percent at a party, and it takes me two hours to get it back up to 100 percent. Are you with me?
And I do that in silence. Now, Brook, ever need that? Matter of fact, silence makes her battery go. Parties make her battery go. I'll never understand that. I'll never understand that. Matter of fact, the beginning of our marriage, it caused many problems because I thought she loved others more than she loved me, because whenever she got in the quiet of our house with me, i'm ready to go, and she was ready to check out. Are you with me today? Diversity causes problems, and it certainly causes problems where there is no love for your brother. The reality is, at the very heart, like what I'm saying, when you're so you-focused, it's not good enough to notice that other people are different. You have to come up with snide, passing, offhand comments that attack their personality and elevate yours. This is going to hit everybody and you're all going to think I'm talking about you, but I'm talking about us, baby. Here's some that I've heard, and I can only speak on my accord, but here's some that I've heard to put out there for us to help understand how self-focus diminishes others and elevates ourselves and creates problems in our fellowship. Here's some I've heard: Shawn, you just don't like people. As if I don't like people and you do like people. Are you with me? Diminishing, elevating. All the introverts unite, right? We like people. How many of you introverts in here like people? I like people, I just don't look like it sometimes, especially if your personality is, the way that I see that you like people is to hang out and party with people 24/7, then you would think I don't like people. But there's diversity. All right, here's another one: you don't like to have fun. Who in their life's like, you know what, fun, that's for the birds, I want misery?
You know, no one's like that. No one's like that. That's a crazy thing to say. From your perspective and your diverse differences, you think I don't like to have fun, but why do you have to say that? I'll tell you why. Because diversity creates division when love is not at the foundation of what we're doing, when self- love becomes higher than mutual love. How many of you are guilty of self-love? And the reality is it should be all of us, although all of us didn't raise our hand. Diversity in marriage causes dissension. Why can't you just be more like me? We all will never say that because we don't want to get stabbed, but we think it. We think it. If you'd just be like me, we just would never fight. Y'all would kill each other. You would kill each other if you were exactly alike in everything. Diversity in marriage, one of the hardest things. When you talk to people who are married, and I know this because I have 25 years' experience, some of you here today have way more experience than me. I feel like I'm getting seasoned enough, I can't really, I'm seasoned enough and been married long enough, I'm not quite sure what is wisdom that I've grown in and just sheer exhaustion. I can't tell. Some people look on my marriage like, you guys are so wise and patient and loving, and I'm like, y'all, we don't, just never see you really fighting much, and when it is, it's like, you're talking about how it's a big fight, and I'm like, I thought y'all were, like, I was loving, and I'm thinking, I'm just tired. I don't even have it. I don't even care no more. Are you with me? So before you look at my marriage and be like, man, they got it together, they love the Lord, Jesus is in that thing, man, he's the glue that holds them together, they just are infatuated with each other, and, well, we're tired.
Tired. Okay, so all you who've been married five years, just hold on, baby, you'll get tired too, and your marriage will be like a sweet aroma to the church. Right. All right, so diversity in marriage, right? I'm joking, I'm joking, but it's kind of true, a little bit true. You do grow sweeter, because you understand there is a little sweetness. There is exhaustion and then there is sweetness, and there's wisdom, because you learn we're not ever going to be at the same place on the path.
We'll be on the same path, but we won't be at the same place on the path. Can I get an amen up in here? Amen. Okay, diversity amongst children. Yeah, I mean, come on, can I get an amen up in here? How many of you have more than one kid? All right, they told me when I had my second baby that baby, if the first baby slept great, the second baby would be a holy terror from hell, never sleep, be crazy, do all kinds of horrible things. If this one was precious, this one was going to be the devil. That's what they said. How many know diversity? Diversity, there's diversity in your children. I know you thought you were going to pop all these kids out and they were all going to be exactly like you, but there's diversity. Your marriage and you produce a child, there's going to be diversity in your children. Can I get an amen up in here? One's going to be extroverted and the other might be introverted. One's going to be crazy and the other's going to be sane. Absolutely. One's going to be smart and the other's going to be not so smart. One might be the most gorgeous swan physically in all the world, and the other one might be trying to be. That's life. Diversity. Let me tell you, let me tell you what, and I'm speaking to this, and you guys think I'm being crazy, but you know how brothers hate each other and sisters hate each other and how they're always competing to be like the other? It is because we as parents don't understand that diversity is beautiful, and we haven't fostered an environment in our home where we have created a space for each individual, although different, special. You have a duty, parents, to foster an environment in your home where your kids do not compete with one another like we compete with one another in the church, where we understand that it is our diversities that make us a body and make us whole. So young people, instead of trying to be like your friend or be like somebody else in the school or be like your other sibling or be like your parent or be like your hero, discover who you are in Christ, and it is that he has created you to be, and be it with all your heart. Diversity between churches. Nothing will get nastier on Twitter than diversity between churches. Oh, I have some opinions, I've expressed them here, but we need to understand that there is no world where every church will be the same and every church will act the same. There's diversity. Diversity in value systems. Some of you value sports, some of you do not at all, and those of you who do not value sports might become judgmental of those who do. Are you with me here today? There are women in here today who have a value system that I should stay home and raise my kid, and there are women here today that say, I have a value system that I'm not going to stay home and raise my kid, I'm going to go work to provide for my kid. One of these is not more godly than the other. This is good news. I know you think it is, but it's not.
I know you're wondering and trying to think of scriptures, but it's not. Diversity in hobbies, diversity in small groups. I hear cracks, one small group cracking on another small group because they're not like their small group, all the time, all the time, all the time, all the time. Y'all nasty with each other about your small groups. Listen, and I know y'all love each other, you're like, we're the best part of waking up is our small group in your cup. Wrong. There's more than one small group. We're all unique. Amen. The small groups are diverse. Amen. They're different. You don't have to bring someone else's down to elevate yourself. We know you're all that in a bag of chips. Just eat your chips and stay quiet in your small group, you know what I mean? And the reality is we war... Again, you guys, the reality is we war against diversity and the innate desire to rally. We want to rally with mere versions of ourselves in life, and that is the single greatest cause for disunity in the world today. So we fragment off in groups of mere versions of ourselves. You can see it today. A person can come in here today and find somebody that's a mirror version of themselves within two weeks, and let me tell you, that doesn't help the body, it hurts it. What you need to do is branch out and meet somebody that ain't the mere version of yourself,
Because we are whole and we are the body of Christ in diversity, not in sameness.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 54:52
Love. Diversity is a problem, love's a problem. The problem is we love
Point 4We withhold support when we misjudge one another
Ourselves, we don't love others, and that's a problem. Another problem is support in the church, and I'm almost done. Support in the church. We don't support one another like we ought to. Romans 14:2 says, One person believes, everybody say believes, he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables. Listen to this: your belief has no shaping effect on truth.
What you believe doesn't change truth. It don't matter what you believe about it ain't going to change the truth on the subject. And the truth is this ain't a sin issue and it don't matter that much, because you could either eat or not eat and still please the Lord. That's the truth. So don't, listen, and here's what we do. Here's what brings division, right? And here's what caused us not to support one another, is that we elevate what we believe and make it truth, and it's not truth. The reason there's little support in the church, we have... The is this: there's two things he mentions, the weak and the strong. Here's why we don't support one another: the weak have marked unruly what God has marked as strong.
You'll have to go home and think about that, I'm out of time. We say that if people indulge they're unruly and out of control. God says they're strong. Who gets the final word? And you don't want to support somebody you've marked as unruly, because why would you support an unruly person? Likewise, the strong have marked legalistic what God has marked weak, and why would you support someone who's legalistic? It's because you've improperly marked them.
It is not your right to mark people and judge them according to their character, but rather it is God's place to mark them, and in this Scripture he has marked them as godly, not unruly and not legalistic.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 57:00
An understanding of sin and liberties, the better way. What I mean here, there's a popular saying in greater evangelicalism that goes something like this. I wish I had more time, I don't, I really don't, but I wish I did. And it's this statement, and I want... You guys aren't going to like this, and I might get some conversations about this, but that's okay. There's this popular statement, it goes like this: it's a sin for them but not for me. Or let's reverse it: it's a sin for me but not for them. Here's another statement: that's not my personal conviction. Your belief about that doesn't change truth, and contrary to what woke ideology says today, there is a universal truth regarding sin, and that has applied to all men.
Sin is sin for all men.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 58:23
Not me, not you, not me sometimes and you maybe not, if I'm convicted and you're not convicted. No, sin is sin. To better explain what I mean, this is, I believe, shaped by this idea of personal truth. There is no objective truth. There is, but there is one truth, and that truth is equally applied to all people, and the truth is sin is what God says it is, not what you believe it is, and God is clear on this subject. But why does this ideology affect support in the church, or lack of it? Because if there is no universal truth, how am I supposed to support a brother or sister whose pathway is different than mine? If we believe that everyone has their own pathway, how am I to support them on that pathway if I'm on a different pathway? Are you with me today? I don't have time, I'm really moving through this fast, I wanted to spend more time. If I'm on one pathway going that way and Brook is on the pathway going that way, how am I supposed to stand in solidarity and support her if my pathway is going the opposite way of her pathway?
You got me today, but the reality is we're all on one pathway. We're all on one pathway. We're not, people aren't on separate paths.
Instead, we're all traveling along the same path, we're just at different stages,
Pastor Shawn Gray · 1:00:04
and the way we can provide support is when we have advanced down the path to a place we can look back and speak with help to those who are at a point we used to be at. We don't offer support in the church
Point 5Jesus is Lord, not me and not you
Because we each believe we have our own path, and we don't, we don't. And the last thing is Lord in the church. Who's Lord in the church? This is a problem. Romans 14:7–9: For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself. For if we live to the Lord, and if we die to the Lord. So whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord's. For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord of the living and the dead.
Romans 14:4: Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls, and he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.
You are not Lord. Your neighbor is not Lord. Jesus is Lord.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 1:01:09
How does a proper understanding of that statement help us live in loving, supportive unity with brothers and sisters that are diverse in the church? I believe it's because this perspective that Jesus is Lord and not I am Lord recalibrates our gaze heavenward and not sideward. We realize our insignificance, the insignificance of us in the face of his all-sufficient glory. Here are two famous quotes, and I'll close, which reveal the arrogance of men who don't understand the lordship of Christ. Arrogance of men, so self-aware, so self-trusting, so become the reason for their asphyxia, their death.
He is not the air we breathe, we are the air we breathe, and the arrogance is the thing that smothers us to death.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 1:02:26
John Lennon says this, and they have a picture. He says this: Christianity will go. Arrogance of men. It will vanish and shrink. I needn't argue about that. I'm right and I will be proved right. We're more popular than Jesus now. I don't know which will go first, rock and roll or Christianity. And then this one, Edward John Smith, the designer and builder of the Titanic, said this: Not even God can sink this ship. Right before it disembarked.
This is the attitude of many of us in church, although those are secular men. We see secular attitudes in the church, so arrogant, so self-aware, so self-loving in the midst of diversity. We capitalize on our diversity to elevate ourselves, to make ourselves grand, because we've forgotten that there is only one who is grand, and his name is Jesus Christ, and he is our Lord.
The more we glorify him, the less we glorify self, and the less we glorify self, the more unity abounds in our house.
Pastor Shawn Gray · 1:03:51
Oh Lord, let unity be our course.
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